Magnus' Failure
by DrVamp
Summary: Once he promised a woman he'd save her son. Once he promised a friend he'd save his wife. Both times he failed, both times he hurt someone deeply, and these failures had a hefty price to pay.


**Four moments in Magnus' life which overlapped with Raphael's once the latter becomes a vampire- how he changed over fifty years. I don't know- I can see them having a complex relationship. **

_"Please, senor, find my son! He's a young boy, he's probably hurt or frightened-" the woman broke off, turned away for a few minutes, "-and he's my eldest child. He's... he's his father's favourite, too. It'll break him. Break us all. Please..."_

Magnus recalled Marcella Santiago's words as he glanced at her son, bleeding from a severe cut on his arm that Camille, in utter outrage over his stupidity, had splashed holy water into. It was still dripping, falling onto his floor, and he moved with more speed than he'd have assumed he had, pulling Raphael over to his "clinic".

'What did you do?' he asked quietly, 'it's unlike Camille to strike without provocation.'

'I told her her plan was stupid,' Raphael said, wincing as Magnus poured a potion into his wound. It steamed, and Raphael's lip trembled as he fought not to make any noise. He was quite young- he'd only been a vampire for about five years, and he'd already been in the clinic far too much for Magnus to feel truly comfortable leaving him on the doorstep.

'What plan?'

'She wants to move all of us into the... ow... house she brought. It's big enough, but I don't want to leave the mansion. It's perfectly sound, and it's a nice place.'

'Raphael, let Camille do what she will. You're still just a kid-" and how his face changed, from being open and listening attentively, to shutting Magnus out, "-and although you're clever you're not invincible.'

'I know.' He jumped up, moving his now almost-healed arm about. 'Thanks, Bane. How much do I owe you?'

'Fifteen dollars, since it's you.'

Raphael fished out the cash, tossed it at Magnus and bounded off. Magnus, wandering over to the window, saw some other young vampires waiting for him. When Raphael tumbled out the door, they all rushed to their bikes, climbing on and laughing and joking. They acted like the teens they were.

'I hope they never have to grow up,' Magnus whispered quietly.

Magnus had been drinking a cup of tea in a cafe, eyes watching the road for his familiar dealer. He hadn't really liked drugs in early centuries, but what were the seventies for? He enjoyed doing them with his friends, and it wasn't like it could kill him.

'Boo.'

Magnus spun around, eyes widening in surprise. He turned sharply to see Raphael, his jacketless arms covered in tattoos that would fade in ten years' time, laughing his head off. He reeked of marijuana and vodka and his grin was wider than a normal person's.

'You're enjoying yourself, aren't you?' Magnus murmured, surreptitiously checking just how high Raphael was. 'I suppose you think that was funny.'

'Not really,' Raphael smiled, 'I just saw you and thought I'd surprise you. I wonder if you remember what day it is?'

'It's your birthday, isn't it?' Magnus replied, and saw the flicker of shock in Raphael's eyes, carefully disguised and hidden. Even stoned out of his brain, the boy was a quick one. 'The seventeenth of November, 1978. You're forty three, although technically you're fifteen. Happy birthday.'

'Thanks. I didn't just come for that, though. I came because Camille owes you cash, and honestly, I do too I'm sure.'

'The vampires of the New York Coven cost only $3000 in Warlock fees this year, Raphael. An astonishingly small number.'

'Yeah, well...' Raphael hesitated and then said, 'the shadowhunters are all drunk too, and so we can do what we like and they're too...' he sought for a word in his alcohol pickled brain, 'hungover to do anything.'

'It is quite nice, yeah.'

'I'm engaged.'

'I heard. She seems nice.'

'She is. She is, and she's Camille's third, too.'

'So she's almost as powerful as you?'

'Yeah. More so in some ways, I guess.'

'I hope you and Amanda are happy, Mr. Santiago.'

'You too, Bane, you too.'

Magnus stood, spying James hustling his wares across the road. He patted Raphael on the shoulder as he passed him, smiling as Raphael scowled, then ruffling his long curls just to irritate him further.

'Good night and happy birthday.'

'Good night.'

Amanda Byrnes' corpse was lying on his clinic's table. Raphael was sobbing openly as Magnus tried to comfort the boy. He'd been on the toilet when Raphael had run in, using the key Magnus had given him for his fiftieth birthday, yelling about demons.

Magnus had done what he could, but he'd run out of a potion which he'd joked about to Raphael-currently his only friend living nearby-almost two weeks ago, and he hadn't refilled them. Amanda would have been fine, perhaps- would certainly have lived slightly longer and had a chance for her natural quick healing to kick back in- but he'd been lazy, and stupid, and now Raphael was so very upset.

'I'm so sorry.' Magnus hugged Raphael, as he had when he'd pulled him up from the blood soaked dirt, holding him so his head was tucked under his chin. 'I'm so sorry.'

'You should've refilled them,' Raphael murmured listlessly. 'You could've.'

'Yes, I know.'

Suddenly full of rage, Raphael's huge black eyes bored into Magnus'.

'You killed my wife.'

'I'm sorry.'

'You killed her!' Raphael threw Magnus' key at him, bloody tears leaving streaks on his red-stained face. 'I never want to see you again, you killed her, you killed her, you're a fucking moron, you could've saved her, you let her die! You let her die!'

'I'll have the body sent to the Dumort.'

'You do that, you do that you utter bastard. But don't you ever bloody talk to me again.'

'I'm sorry!' Magnus called as Raphael stormed out, wiping his nose noisily on his sleeve.

'I'm sorry.'

Magnus hurried to the window; peered down and out. _Raphael really shouldn't be driving, _Magnus thought, _oh, good. He's walking. _

That was the last time Magnus saw Raphael for twenty two years.

Magnus was following Alec into some anonymous Jewish cemetery- a pretty place- Clary's choice, obviously, carrying plastic bags full of blood. He assumed Lily or Jacob would be overseeing proceedings- the head or second of a coven didn't do such business, unless they were themselves a sire.

So it was a suckerpunch to see Raphael standing over a grave. He was yawning, trying not to look bored, though Magnus could see the tells in the vampire.

'High Warlock,' he said, and didn't that just sting although he couldn't keep the shock from his expression for a few seconds. 'You keep surprisingly illustrious company, Shadowhunter.' He was talking to Jace, ignoring Magnus quite completely, but for that tiny comment.

'You talking about yourself again? That seems boastful.'

And Alec spoke up, making Magnus love him more. 'Maybe he means me. Sorry, I'm nervous.'

Magnus wanted to kiss him, but he settled for trying to hold his hand, although Alec moved away which Raphael noticed, and he smirked slightly. Magnus fought to keep his hand from throwing an especially large rock at his former friend's head.

He didn't look much like the Raphael he used to know- his hair was longer, and he was wearing much more formal clothes- no tattoos, and he didn't look like he was drunk or longing for a cigarette. Obviously he'd gotten over his grief.

Magnus wished to talk to Raphael, but he decided to go and talk to the Shadowhunters instead. Two could play the blanking game.

He just wished he'd managed to help Marcella Santiago.

He didn't want to be saddled with his failure forever.

Or a lapsed friendship.


End file.
